Wednesday, October 30, 2013


We left off with me freaking out about money and then Dude and I having to decide between four options to calm my fears and keep our wedding budget at a reasonable amount:

  • Cut down the guest list
  • Come to peace with the money we'd be spending
  • Have a small destination wedding
  • Change the venue and get the cost-per-person to something more manageable

It’s been tough for Dude to nail down any feelings he has about the wedding, but cutting down the guest lists is one thing he’s been adamant about. 

He said, in the end, he’d rather deal with the financial repercussions of inviting his entire extended family than deal with the emotional backlash.

So cutting down the guest list was out.

After a lot of soul-searching, we eventually realized we were not OK with the financial burden we would be putting on ourselves to have the big blowout wedding at the DoubleTree. 

So coming to peace with the money we were spending was out.

Doeblerghini Bunch:  Pinterest ECard
I seriously researched a small, intimate destination wedding in Atlantic Beach, North Carolina.  We went so far as to create a preliminary guest list and got information from a lot of vendors in the area.

But the more Dude and I talked, the more obstacles we saw. 

Atlantic Beach far from just about everywhere.  The closest airport is 30 minutes away, but it’s small and only one flight from Pittsburgh goes there every day.  The second-closest international airport is over two hours away in Raleigh.  The drive from Pittsburgh is 10 hours, the drive from my hometown is 8, and the drive from New York is 12 hours.  The closest person to Atlantic Beach is still a five-hour drive. 

We felt selfish.  Even though Dude and I love Atlantic Beach, we felt selfish asking people to put out so much money to come to our wedding.  Especially considering five members of our wedding party are parents, two to babies who would be less than a year old at the time of the wedding.   

Planning a second reception.  This is what scared me the most.  Planning one reception is hard enough!  I can’t imagine planning two, even if the second one is more casual. 

So as much as I loved the idea of getting married on the beach, a small destination wedding was out. 

In the end, it was more process of elimination than a conscious decision, but we decided that we would suck it up, lose our deposits, and move our wedding venue. 

We are back on the venue hunt! 

Tell me I’m not alone!  After making your wedding plans (and sending in deposits) did you decide to change them?  Did you encounter any obstacles?

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